Hang out is not Dating!

Dating?? ? Most young adults are not dating. We are hanging out. Dating is dead! Most young people are just hanging out with the opposite sex. We are not asking each other out on dates to spend one on one with someone. We are not taking the time get to know each other on a personal level. We are hanging out in large groups of boys and girls. Many young people are also jumping into the physical parts of the relationship and skipping over many steps to dating.

Just because a boy takes you out doesn't mean that you are dating them or that you are going to marry them. Dating is a way to get to know each other Dating should be spending time to get know a particular person. Dating lots of different people allows you to know what type of person you like or what you want in a spouse. We need to take the time to get to know each other before we just jump into a relationship. There needs to be trust in a relationship, trust is earned by spending time with that person and getting to know them. Once we start a physical relationship we are putting a lot of trust into that person. A physical relationship to boys is not that big of a deal but to a girl it is everything. Once we start that connection with someone there no going back to just being friends.

Let's think before we act on the feelings we are feeling for the opposite sex. Let's think about the feelings that the other person could be having for you. Let's take a step back and look at the relationship. Let's shut off the Netflix and Video games and ask each other on dates. Let's put away our phones when we are on dates. Let’s try talking to the person we are with so we can get to know each other. 

Pornography

For my generation I know that pornography is a big struggle for many. Pornography can pop up on our screens even without us looking for it. Pornography is not just a problem for MEN/BOYS it also has become a problem for WOMEN/GIRLS. Men are more likely to look at pictures or videos. Women are more likely to read about pornography in books. No matter how pornography is viewed it is wrong for both men and women.

When someone is married and they are looking at porn it takes away from their sex life with their partner. After they view porn they start to think about pornography more often. This could lead them away from the intimacy they would be having with their partner. Their partner may not be able to give them the same feelings that they got by reading or looking at porn. 

The way that we can avoid porn is by closing the book and reading something else, or shutting off the screen that came up with pornography on it. 

Delaying Marriage

Why are people delaying marriage? For women it could because they don't want to commit to a relationship. That they want a career instead of a family. Or that no one will commit to them. No girl wants to be alone forever. Girls need to be willing to commit to the right kind of men. For men it could because they want to keep living a bachelor like life style. They don't want to shut off the video games or the sport channel, or it could be because they have the career they want to worry more about then a family or a marriage. They could also be saying that they don't have time to commit to a serious relationship so they just mess around with noncommittal relationships.  It takes a man ready and mature enough to get a commit to girl to them. The more that they delay marriage the more they can effect their future family. It's a lot easier on women to have children when they are in there 20's. In their life, if they delay marriage, then can only have one to two children. I feel that one of our goals should be getting married and having child. That is the greatest blessing that we can have in life.

Family

Family is the center of our world. When we are born we know what love is and what it's like to love someone. Some of us are not close to our families but we know that deep down that we are loved by them.

Being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints I was born into a family with loving parent and grandparents. I know that when I came into this world that I was love by many. As the years went on that my brothers came into the world. My love for my family grew. Family is the one things that I can't live without. There may be days that I don't get a long with my brothers but at the end of the day I still love them. The family has taught me so many lessons. It taught me to be patience with people. I had to have patience with my brother Greg in the morning we would be yelling at each other on what time we were leaving for school. I was the one that had to be on time to everything and him, he could leave at the time that we need to be there. My mom taught me how to clean and cook and make sure that I had a clean room, and putting things away when I'm done using it. She helped me see things around the house that needed to be done and taught me to clean them without being ask to. The greatest thing that my mom taught me was how to one day be a mother. I'm so thankful that my parents got married in the temple for all time eternity. I get to live this life and the after life with this crazy family;

"Ohana means family, family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten"

I really didn't understand what family really meant till I left home and moved to college. Even though I have moved out of the house I'm still there. I still have my room and my spot at the table. Just the only thing is that I just don't live there. We can't live without our families. What does family mean to you?

Future Father

I want to find a husband that will be involved in my children lives. I want my husband to be there for our children when they come into this world. I will help my husband be involved in the birth so he can bond with our children from the beginning. I hope my husband will want to help when our children are ill. It meant a lot to me when my father stayed with me in the hospital, and I hope that if given a similar situation that my husband would do the same for his children. I will let my husband have one on one time with each of our children. I will encourage my children to be excited when he returns home from work or a business trip.  I want my children to know that they can always go to their father. I will allow and want my children to talk and to listen to their father’s advice. I will want my husband to take time out of his busy life to find activities that he can share with them. 

I am dating and considering someone to share my life with, I can pay attention to see if he is comfortable with children. Something that I can do to find out how he will react to children is to spend time with him around young children. I have a lot of younger cousins and it would be fun to babysit them with my future spouse. Before we are married I would ask and discuss with him his anticipated involvement with our children. I hope that by doing some of these things before we are married we will better understand each other’s feelings about children and the relationship we want to have with them.

Communicating

In class this week we discussed communication. When you are not talking you are still using words you are still communicating with your body.

When you are in a relationship you need to have deep conversations with your partner. You need to be able to talk about things that are going on within your home. You need to communicating about starting a family and about the children you are parenting. Dealing and communicating about problems early on, is best. If you do not deal with them problems right away, you might just make the problem worse.

At school you have to learn to communicate with roommates. College student bring different aspect to the apartment. When college students find out who their roommates are going to be, it is good to start communicating right away to find out about each other. It is a good idea to talk about what everyone is going to bring to the apartment such as kitchen and bathroom supplies. Communicating before hand helps for a smoother transition on move in day. I have had roommates where we did not really communicate with each other until move in day, we started having problems right after moving in with each other. I have had to learn to keep communicating with my roommates throughout the semester about things that are bothering me. When my roommates explain things that are bothering them, I have to listen and have had to learn to make adjustments to help keep peace in the apartment. 

Type 1

With permission from my brother Greg, I'd like to share his story. Greg was 10 years old when his life changed forever. Greg was having mood swings, drinking a lot of water, and was constantly having to urinate. No one knew for sure what was going on with him. My mom called the doctor one day and told them about Greg’s symptoms. The doctor told my mom that he needed to be seen right away. My dad was with Greg on a field trip, and as soon as the field trip was over my dad took Greg to see the doctor. When they got to the doctor’s office they started running tests. At home we didn't know what was going to happen to Greg. My dad finally called and told my mom that Greg was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. I remember thinking that only old people had diabetes. My family’s thoughts were how this could have happened. We now know that it was no one’s fault because Type 1 Diabetes is an autoimmune disease.

We all had to learn to help Greg. We learned what we needed to watch out for when his blood sugar was too high or too low. My family started packing snacks to take with us wherever we went, and made sure we always had his insulin on-hand to help adjust his blood sugar. My parents would set alarms to wake in the middle of the night to check on him and to make sure that his blood sugar wasn’t getting too low. 

Greg went to clinical studies to help find a cure for Type 1 Diabetes. My parents thought it would be good to help with finding a cure. He went to the Humphrey’s Diabetic Center in Boise, Idaho for two weeks. He was administered a drug through his veins in his arm and he would give blood sample every day for the two weeks. While under the study he would take movies and video games to the center to help pass the time. I remember that he would come home very sick!  Because the medicine made Greg so sick he had to be taken off the study.

Greg had a hard time coming to grips with why he was the one in five hundred to get this disease. I remember that he would say that he was done dealing with his diabetes and get mad and would not want to take anymore shots. It was not only hard on him but all of us, seeing him go through this. My other brothers and I had to get tested for diabetes as well. Every year we went in the doctor's office to be screened for diabetes. My younger brothers hated going and being tested.

Several years after Greg was diagnosed with diabetes he went to a diabetic camp. While at this camp Greg came to realize that there are many other kids dealing with this same disease. He also realized that several of them had other auto-immune health problems at the same time. After he attended several of these camps Greg started to become more accepting of his disease and he realized that it could be a lot worse. These camps were also great at teaching him ways that he could care for his diabetes by himself. 

I wish that I could say that it has gotten easier for Greg.  Greg does have a better attitude about his disease but most days he still wishes this hadn’t happened. Greg and my family are still looking forward to the day when a cure for this awful disease is found. In the meantime, I am so proud of Greg’s courage through this difficult challenge.